After the Auction
by ApatheticOnion
Summary: Cecil returns home after the broadcast of episode 37, still upset about the auction.


There were few noises in Night Vale that could still generate immediate concern in Carlos. Disembodied wailing from the toaster, hissing shower curtains and moans of despair from the street grates had all become par for the course over the last year and a half that Carlos had lived in the isolated desert town. Only two sounds remained that could still get him on his feet and running in an instant, and those consisted of abnormally copious amounts of screaming from the town's citizens, or a piteously small warble of-

"_Carlooos_?" Carlos dropped the crayon he had been writing his latest reports with and dashed out to the living room, where Cecil was leaning against the closed front door, keys still in hand. His lower lip was jutting out in what would otherwise have been a cartoonishly cute pout, but the tears quickly gathering in his eyes wiped any smile that might have formed from Carlos' face as he moved towards Cecil, arms outstretched.

"What's wrong, _cariño_?" Carlos soothed, wrapping his arms around Cecil and rubbing one hand gently along Cecil's back as he sniffed.

"S-someone b-b-bought meeee." Cecil wailed, sobbing into Carlos' shoulder. Carlos raised an eyebrow, leaning back to look Cecil in the eye with a half-smile. Cecil looked affronted at Carlos' amusement and pulled away, his expression hurt.

"This isn't funny, Carlos!" Cecil stomped over to the couch and threw himself into the cushions, arms crossed as tears continued to pour down his cheeks. Carlos sat down beside him and tried to wrap his arms around him, but Cecil scooted away. Carlos sighed.

"Cecil-"

"I can't believe you find this amusing!" Cecil jumped up and began pacing angrily back and forth across the living room. "What if it was StrexCorp?"

"_Cecil-_" Carlos tried again, running one hand through his hair in exasperation when Cecil continued to pace, ignoring him.

"Or worse!" Cecil's expression turned dangerously dark as he paused in his pacing and hissed, "What if it was_Steve Carlsburg_?"

Carlos burst out laughing, quickly tried to cover his outburst with a cough, then promptly lost control at the sight of the dramatic pose Cecil had taken upon saying that horrible name. Cecil burst into renewed tears, storming down the hallway and slamming the door to their bedroom behind him as Carlos wiped the tears of laughter from his own face.

"_Mierda_," Carlos swore, stumbling to his feet and running after his angry boyfriend. He tried to open the door to the bedroom, only to find it locked. He sighed, resting his forehead against the wood.

"Cecil, please open the door. I'm sorry I laughed, I didn't mean to upset you." An angry sniff from somewhere on the other side of the door was his only response.

"Cecil, please! I wasn't- I wasn't laughing at you- well, I mean, I was, but- _Dios_, Cecil, I'm the one who bought you!"

Dead silence followed this admission. Carlos counted out a full minute in his head and then sighed once more, resigning himself to a night on the couch when a soft 'click' signaled the bedroom door had unlocked. He turned back, meeting Cecil's suspicious glare.

"_You_ bought me?" Cecil questioned slowly. Carlos nodded, and Cecil opened the door wide enough to allow Carlos entry. He followed Cecil over to their bed and sat down beside him, taking both his hands in his own. Cecil's tattoos retreated up under the sleeves of Cecil's shirt, warning that Cecil was still irritated with Carlos.

"You were there, Cecil, how did you not see me?" Carlos asked, rubbing his thumb over the knuckles of Cecil's pale hands. Cecil stared resolutely at the floor and fidgeted.

"I… I panicked when they called the Lot number, and when I realized I'd forgotten to bid I.." Cecil's cheeks turned red. "I got so upset that I teared up and couldn't see who had won." Carlos chuckled softly, and Cecil shot him a warning glare. Carlos stopped.

"I thought it was a joke, at first." Carlos admitted. "I mean, I'd heard of people being auctioned off for a day or so as a charity thing, but knowing how things tend to work a little, uh, _differently_ here…" He trailed off, watching Cecil's expression as he continued to glare at the floor. "Well, I didn't want to take any chances. And I knew you had your show, so I didn't think you'd be able to bid for yourself."

Cecil slowly snuck a glance up at Carlos and studied his expression for a moment before finally relaxing against Carlos' shoulder. Carlos wrapped his arms around him and planted a soft kiss on top of Cecil's head.

"You're a jerk." Cecil muttered, sniffling. Carlos grinned.

"I know. I'm sorry." Carlos gave Cecil a gentle squeeze. Cecil frowned.

"How much did you pay for me?" Carlos' eyes widened in surprise and he laughed.

"Really? You were just sold at auction and that's the only question you have?"

"Well," Cecil huffed, shifting further into Carlos' arms. "Now that I know it was you who bought me, yes, that is the only question I have left."

"Well," Carlos hummed in thought. "There was the cost of signing up for the auction, then the actual bid, and there was a tax on top of that…" He glanced down at Cecil, who was staring up at him curiously. "About 8,000."

"What?!" Cecil screeched, jolting upright. Carlos looked at him in bemusement as Cecil stared back at him in horror. "Carlos, that's – you don't have that kind of money!"

"Nope, I don't." Carlos admitted. "But the grant my team received for our research here includes a stipend for the obtaining of any objects of excessive scientific value pertinent to our research." Cecil stared at him blankly. "In Layman's Terms, anything scientifically interesting. And I'm pretty sure you qualify under that description." He glanced at the currently closed third eye on Cecil's forehead and down to the moving tattoos that had snuck back down around Cecil's wrists. Cecil turned pink.

"You didn't have to do that." Cecil mumbled, curling back up against Carlos and wrapping his arms around him. "But I'm glad you did." He added earnestly. Carlos smiled.

"Best 8,000 I ever spent." Carlos crooned. Cecil rolled his eyes, then paused and slowly grinned up at him cheekily.

"Sooo, what are you going to do with your new purchase?" Cecil teased, playing with the top button of Carlos' shirt. Carlos lay down on the bed, pulling Cecil with him.

"Well, it didn't come with any instructions, so I'll probably have to be very hands-on to figure out how it works." Carlos mused, kissing gently along Cecil's collarbone as he pulled him closer. "For science, of course."

"Of course." Cecil nodded with mock solemnity. Carlos was straddling him now, hands tugging at his shirt.

"And I'll probably have sex with it." Carlos added. Cecil laughed, swatting at Carlos as he sat up and pulled off his lab coat.

"Also for science?" Carlos cringed.

"God, no. You never put your dick in science, it always ends horribly." Cecil raised an eyebrow.

"And you would know this… how?"

Carlos glared at him, pulling his shirt off and tossing it onto the floor.

"Shut up and take your pants off."


End file.
